Finding motivation when depressed
By Margaret Lanning
My brother once said that his earliest memories of our mother involved a sound. He could hear her footsteps moving back and forth through rooms, up and down the stairs, in and out of doors. Never stopping. Always cleaning, wiping, dusting. She was evermore a woman on a mission, with a dust mop in her hands.
I grew into the ultimate of imitators. I matched the standards that were set and adopted them as my own—that is, until my responsibilities became too many and too heavy. Then I struggled just to get out of bed while unsatisfied duties lay strewn around the house and office. Motivation flew south with the Canadian geese that year.
My counselor disagreed with me every time I brought up my lack of motivation. I said I had a “want to” problem. I didn’t really want to do anything but read, watch TV, crochet, eat. She pushed back, saying that I was a perfectionist living with unrealistic expectations. If I would sift more carefully through real and imagined obligations, I could choose wisely and have more impetus to do those.
My immediate thought was that I needed to go live deep in the woods somewhere where no one would bother me … but since the wilderness didn’t seem to be a viable option, I was left with a problem.
Find your desire
Lack of motivation is probably the most difficult part of depression I continue to wrestle with. Trying to figure out how to get up and get moving is extremely challenging. It can make or break a day.
When I feel apathetic, my senseless thought cycle starts with the notion that I need to choose to do something (clean the kitchen). Then comes immediate resistance (I don’t want to clean the kitchen), then the guilt trip (good mothers clean kitchens so the family can be healthy), then the compromise (I can have a bite of chocolate if I clean the kitchen), then the shut-down (but I still don’t want to clean, and I’ll probably eat the whole chocolate bar), then the self-punishment (I am a bad person because I’m still sitting here).
This summer a friend asked me to join a Bible study with her. The study was on gifting and passions. As we got into the material, I took several tests. Checking boxes on lists of possible interests, I got a clearer picture of myself.
I am an encourager (an exhorter) whose passion lies in motivating (ironically) adults and children into closeness with God through spoken and written word.
This information sharpened the filter through which all possible responsibilities pass. What seems best for me is accepting tasks that use my abilities and rejecting ones that fit someone else better. So I began to review items on my calendar.
I was able to let some things go. And I added one “to-do”—the difference being that my motivation would be higher to accomplish what I was passionate about.
“Lack of motivation is probably the most difficult part of depression I continue to wrestle with.”
I also realized that I could attend to my responsibilities with more intentionality. For example, when hosting a spaghetti dinner for my daughter’s swim team, I prayerfully floated through the evening looking for opportunities to listen and encourage swimmers or parents. This motivated me to do more than show up with food. I was going to enact my life mission amid the pasta.
what is the difference between tennis and pickleball i will send you the helper who will how many hours a week for benefits how can small businesses improve efficiency What does assume mean? What does pmo mean text? How to clean acrylic paint brushes? How to cut a tri tip? how to set up wii u usb helper injection what is the definition of polyhedron Tips on how to hammurabi code was unjust? what is the difference between 100s and shorts how to improve speed of laptop What is the meaning behind april fools day? which statement best describes your computer skills christian advice how to heal a broken heart How to start cayo perico heist? how are social skills important when advice is not asked for word What does nitroglycerin do? How it ends meaning? What a bomber meaning? What is the meaning of the word thee? where to place ip helper how to improve valheim server performance How to get rid of herpes? How to grow hair fast? how to improve download speed on windows 10 what is the difference between herpes and cold sores How can i print income without tips in quickbooks? How to make money in tips? What time is it in norway? What is the meaning of haka? What does tbh? What does pax romana mean? what the difference between partner and associate What does dry mean? What is human papillomavirus? What does phony mean? what are the benefits of a steam sauna which of the following is not a method used to improve management of tropical rainforests What is a memoir? what channel is the skills competition on tonight Phantom 3 standard how to do tricks? which of the following is true about employee benefits? what are the benefits of sports in school What does fish ick look like? how to improve influence skills What is the meaning of rheumatism? what is the difference between turbocharged and supercharged how to view database sqlite helper on app Cool party tricks to learn when you have too much time? what is the difference between ebay and amazon what is the definition of sweetest day How to get to lake of rot? what is dic benefits from va how to improve your gut microbiome in a day which of the following is the best definition of economic growth? what were some of the benefits of the articles of confederation what is microaggression short definition What is mutual fund meaning? where to learn carpentry skills im the one who always gives advice How to check my itin status online? what is the best financial advice for income over 140k How to paint baseboards? what is the difference between infant tylenol and children's tylenol What is clubhouse? What is the meaning behind christmas? How to make a cover letter? What basic tricks should my dog know? what word matches this definition Wiki how fidget spinner tricks? what skills does customer service give you what level five skills can alpha clones train what is better driver helper in ups or personal vehicle package delivery driver What are some food safety tips? What is the hottest pepper in the world? borderlands 2 when to level up skills which best describes the benefits of renting a home? everfi what is the difference between rms and ppms How does david blaine do tricks reddit? according to the commencement speeches, what advice do both steve jobs and ray bradbury offer? What time does gabe's close? what skills should a virtual assistant have What does a fever feel like? Tips when acting on stage? Tips for fishing when hot? what is the difference in say it ain't so remix what if i used all my unemployment benefits what is the difference between botox and xeomin what were the benefits of the space race What is emdr? How to remove tips airpod pro? what is the definition of legally blind how to apply for social security benefits for spouse What does diabetic neuropathy feel like? how to get enb helper off of my computer What is the meaning of anoxia? how to reset skills in eso covenant how to improve bone structure face How to make a netherite ingot? What does franchise tag mean? what is the difference between yams and sweet potato How to stream olympics? advice for owners of ip when their ip rights are violated. What does relapsed mean? How to do magic tricks in urdu? what is the best divination tool to get advice on a situation What is kyle rittenhouse charged with? What is the meaning of fax machine? what is the difference between 1095-a and 1095-c What does convocation mean? How to draw a side profile? how to cancel panda helper vip What does fsbo mean? What is the meaning of elimination? what is the difference between billing and shipping address What does entourage mean? What are the best days to book flights? 7 tips for negotaiting what you are worth? what is unwarranted advice How many tricks can a cockatiel learn? What is the meaning of a falling star? what is weathering definition who is the black detect helper on shall we dance what is the difference between black and white pepper what are the benefits of growing plants in space How long to grill skirt steak? How to update minecraft bedrock on pc? How to apply for medicaid in florida? What does acetylcholine do? What is meaning sap? should ira follow the friend’s advice? why or why not? what are all the benefits of turmeric? How old do you have to be to babysit? What does pithy mean? what does alt measure where do i fish to improve my skill wow what are the benefits of doordash which is the best definition of a stressed syllable What is your love language? What are the different waterpik tips for? How long should i marinate steak tips with zety italian dressing? What time does it get dark at? what is a family simple definition allocate keystone and notable passive skills which have been transformed by the legion What is the meaning of the name deborah? where to get sex advice what would be the benefits of preventing ptsd how to improve local seo for your business What is the meaning of screeding? at what age do children develop language and communication skills most? where to find advice of valks how does co teaching benefits students What does validate mean? How long will we have to wear masks? what are two health benefits of eating protein the rate at which a baby bird gains weight is proportional to the difference between What does deed restricted mean? What is the meaning of harrowing? What is a skinwalker mean? how to tell difference between mosquito and bed bug bites how to improve composure in fifa 21 what skills can be oberved at departure time what is the difference between mp4 and mov What is the meaning anxiety? what is the difference between medical asepsis and surgical asepsis How long to bake turkey? Tips on how to make your hair grow faster? who to call for advice on social security benefits fort payne al What does so mean? what is difference between drill and impact driver How to make sourdough bread? how to improve hypothyroidism how to improve dancing skills at home how can you improve your eyesight why do you want to improve your written communication what does fathom mean definition what is the difference between an elk and a deer How to play nba 2k16 tips? what is a definition of main idea What does fuel injector cleaner do? Tips to tell which bond is more polar? why does cascode improve gain What are good tips for whole life policy? when looking for a life partner, my advice to women is date all of them what is the size difference between a full and queen bed what benefits does hemp oil have What channel is tnt? What does roflmao mean? What does bequeath mean? which of the following is the best definition for recombinant dna what is the difference between a pergola and a gazebo how are social and interpersonal skills What does an ice bath do? what to do with remittance advice How many years yebba meaning? what are the benefits of carrots What are shade balls? What does mi amor mean in spanish? how to improve placental function What does elusive mean? What are the prime factors of 14? How to do a pivot table in excel? how to get botw to run the smoothest on usb helper what is the definition of patriot What does area mean in math? What does it mean when your nipples itch? How to install gfci outlet? Tips on how to pass med surg online app? What are the birthstones? How to make me cum tips? the board of directors must create an environment in which employees feel they can seek advice how to give nutrition advice to black community What is the meaning of snag? which of the following is not a suggestion for building intercultural skills in the workplace? what are the benefits of chair yoga how to improve camera quality on samsung How to make hush puppies? what advice does the wife of bath offer what heart rate to improve cardio what is difference between will and trust how long does the ups driver helper season last Tips and tricks on how to write a fucking essay? what is the difference between regurgitation and vomiting how to improve balance for yoga hiv positive injection drug users who leave the hospital against medical advice What does scorpio rising mean? what is the difference between a 401a and a 401k How does david blane divhis tricks? who pandemic definition change What does secure the blessings of liberty mean? Fidget spinner videos how to do tricks? what are the health benefits of sea moss gel What does brake fluid do? Tips when drafting a friendly letter? How to rehome a dog? What is the nervous system? How to block spam calls on android? what is the difference between nitrites and nitrates what is the definition of a freak in bed What does sed rate mean? what happens if you reject dr friedlander's advice what is the scientific definition of mass i'm single and alone advice on how to leave things at my death which of these scenarios is an example of reflecting as it relates to listening skills? How to use credit card? what is the difference between arbor day and earth day How to unpop ears? what benefits do military dependents get what is the definition for traditional economy A person who performs balancing tricks others is called? Why do leaves have brown tips? what is the difference betwe how soft skills affect income What is the meaning of dexterous? What does dws mean? what is the difference between similac sensitive and pro sensitive What time does baskin robbins close? how to improve catching skills what skills are needed to be a makeup artist What does lb stand for? how to improve buffering in kodi how to elevate hamburger helper How to clean out ears?